I don’t care if Melania knew. I don’t care if Melania didn’t know. Or chose to look the other way. I don’t care if Melania went down on Stormy Daniels while Donald Trump got-off on watching.
It’s not about sex or lying about sex or cheating. It’s about sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong and the hypocrisy of the religious right.
Tony Perkins gave Donald Trump a mulligan. For those of you who don’t know what a mulligan is, it’s when you make such a bad shot on the golf course that you pretend like it didn’t happen and play another ball. In order for Jesus to play a 2nd ball, he had to be sacrificed. Listen. When there are nails being pounded through your hands and feet, I call that the opposite of a mulligan.
We sacrifice nothing.
12 days until the March For Our Lives in Washington. I wonder who’s going to show up? Anyone can cut a check. Who’s showing up? Who has a thought in their head worth listening to?
So far the biggest idea in the aftermath of the school shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School is “rigorous firearms training” for teachers. We don’t have money for pensions. But there’s plenty of money for guns.
Who are we?
Maybe we should ask Kathy Griffin. A year after everything was taken from her for posting a picture, Kathy has booked a show at Carnegie Hall.
“How do you get to Carnegie Hall?”
“Practice. Practice. Practice.”
A year after trolls terrorized comedy clubs across the country until she was dropped from touring and Donald Trump Junior called for her to be “Decimated,” I’d say Kathy Griffin is ready for her close-up.
Speaking of clowns, I want to thank Steve Bannon. He’s the sad clown wearing the mask of a 12 Step Guru, encouraging haters to take the 1st step…relinquish shame…come out of the closet…so…
My name is Greg Morelli. I’m a racist.
I hate haters who wear the racist badge with pride.
I’m xenophobic-phobic.
I hate haters who can’t be bothered to take a look at the world through the eyes of refugees fleeing for their lives or immigrants uprooting their families for the dream of making a better life on minimum wage plus tips.
I’m homophobic-phobic.
I hate haters who get in the middle of two other people when the sexual chemistry has nothing to do with them in the first fucking place.
Haters please rise for the 2nd step…the pledge of a-sleeze-ance…
I pledge a-sleeze-ance to the flag of the divided states of America and to the republic for which it stood, one nation under clowns, indiscriminate, with porn stars and hatred for all.
Please check back soon for the 3rd step. Until then, get out there and pick on someone who doesn’t deserve it.
Divided States of America, what would be so wrong with that? Every day, I see this country inching closer and closer to political violence. In life, like in a divorce, when it’s time to call it quits it’s time to call it quits. I read flamethrowers on both sides agitating for violence. Even if you were to win you still inherit a group of people that can NEVER coexist in the long term. Do we really want America to be another Northern Ireland or Israel, G-d forbid everyday bombings and soldiers in the street as a part of our daily life? And you think it could never happen here? What the fuck makes America so special? Finally, there used to be an India and one day they made a Pakistan. Sure it wasn’t a silver bullet but it kept peace and quiet for 50 years and BOTH sides live side by side. Wouldn’t it be beautiful to have two States truly independent and free to make their own choice and let history decide what ideas work and which society is better? India and Pakistan, Balkanization.
Take Indiana. Take Texas. Take Alabama. Take Florida (North Florida, not South Florida). Divvy it up. I’m done negotiating with school shooting fetishists, homophobic emotional invalids & the Alt-Fuckyoursef-Right. Abraham Lincoln got shit done once he got rid of the slave owning shitheads. I’m down with everything you’re saying. Why stick with the current states? The boundaries are arbitrary. Let’s take some cold states on both sides, some hot states on both sides, some humid states, some desert states, some mountain ranges, some ocean views, and divvy it up.
Hasta La Vista, Bitches!