FLASH BANG FALLACY

The police are out of control, armed with batons and shields and guns, treating protesters as if they’re looters.

As if.

The president is out of control, using a stroll through Lafayette Park to St. John’s Church as a pretense for shooting rubber bullets and tear gas at protesters. Trump pledged allegiance to peaceful protesters minutes before unleashing Hellfire on them, conflating executive privilege with damnation as if the highest of high was a Bible Photo Op.

As if.

The attorney general is out of control. The secretary of defense is out of control. The press secretary is out of control, although she does look stunning with gold buttons running down a black romper in high heels flanked by five frumpy White Nationalists. It ain’t a dream. It’s a nightmare. Speaking of which…

Joe Biden is asleep.

President Trump calls him Sleepy Joe and I never understood the nickname but I’m starting to get it because I just don’t think Joe Biden has the stamina to go up against toddlers screaming, “White Lives Matter.” 

It takes a special kind of man, it takes a special kind of woman, where destiny is shaped by something bigger than James Carville pushing chocolate eclairs down the throats of focus group casualties.

You cannot beat an entertainer with a politician.

Call me after the election of 2020.

We’ll talk.

Listen.

I’m not saying this to be right. I’m not saying this to be ahead of the curve. I’m not saying this to push buttons or be provocative or wag my finger like a visionary with a bad right eye. I’m saying this because we’re getting killed out here and no one has the humility to take a knee.

Take A Knee…Mayor deBlasio, Mayor Lighfoot, Governor Cuomo, Governor Pritzker. Instead of treating us like obstinate children, imposing an insulting curfew, meet us on the street. 

Take A Knee…President Trump, Attorney General Barr, Defense Secretary Esper. Instead of flash bangs, look to your heart, ask yourself what in the Hell you’re doing with the power you hold, ask yourself why you’re doing what you’re doing with the power you hold. 

Do you think you’re doing good? Really?

Take A Knee…Thomas Lane, J.A. Kueng, Tou Thao. Then surrender. You’re responsible for the murder of George Floyd. 

Even more than the psychopath who kneeled on the neck of George Floyd, you were there, you could have stopped it, you could have stepped in, you could have done something, anything besides putting your hands in your pockets but you chose to quietly go along and that, more than anything else, is what scares us most because if we’re honest, if we look inside our hearts, the truth is we see ourselves in that gesture.

What could be more human?

What. You think you’re a hero? You think you’re built to withstand the backlash? What. You’re the coworker who gets behind the office outcast? You’re the principal who walks into the classroom of the ostracized teacher to build camaraderie? What. You told your husband to learn how to cook a Goddamn meal? You told your wife to get off your back about jerking-off in your own Goddamn house? What. You’re not counting down the days until you can take off your mask, pretend like COVID-19 never happened – since it didn’t happen to you – and go back to the insanity of what spoiled cunt assholes called normal before the pandemic?

As if.

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