Long Form Girth Certificate

President Trump had his annual checkup.

Coming in at 6 foot 3 inches, weighing in at 239 pounds, The Fat Fuck In Chief is 1 pound shy of obese. Needless to say, the authenticity of these numbers are being called into question.

Girther is the new Birther. There are demands for Trump’s Long Form Girth Certificate.

Asked what President Trump could do about his weight, Dr. Jackson said nothing could be done. “It’s genetic,” he said. “Donald Trump’s mama is so fat, she needs Google Maps to find her asshole. Donald Trump’s mama is so fat, her blood type is Nutella. Donald Trump’s mama is so fat, she gets her pedicures at the Brookfield Zoo.”