Little Ditty ‘Bout Harley Barber

The University of Alabama expelled an Alpha Phi sorority member after slur-laden videos she posted earlier this week went viral.

Harley Barber, 19, from Marlton, New Jersey, said she is contrite. “I feel so, so bad,” she said.

That’s a good way to feel. So, so healthy. So, so appropriate. But if I had to guess, I’d say Harley feels bad for how things ended up, not for what she said.

Having said that, the University of Alabama is wrong.

Now more than ever, Harley belongs in school, where she can be taught to think for herself, instead of back home with her racist family, where they’ll give her back the mask of appropriate behavior only with better glue.

You know who should be expelled? All of the people we hear laughing in the background of Harley’s racist ditty. All of the people we hear egging her on, off camera. In fact, everyone in the car should be expelled.

Or sent abroad for 1 year to the South Side of Chicago. Seen through the prism of white nationalism, the South Side of Chicago might as well be a foreign country, so technically, it’s an abroad program.

We can’t change racist behavior by kicking racist children out of college for being who they were taught to be in racist homes where racist behavior is celebrated by loved ones.

Racism is a learned behavior.

I know this for sure seeing as racism was a show I put on for Grandpa Bernie, who loved the words of racial hatred and loved nothing more than hearing me, his grandson, Gregor, use the language of subjugation to show him I understood what he understood and would carry out into the world his valuable point of view.

Turns out, it was valuable. It was a valuable lesson, something I had to unlearn.

Sorry Grandpa Bernie…


Re-enroll Harley Barber at the University of Alabama. Reunite her with all of her racist sorority sisters at Alpha Phi. Get them mandatory internships at The Obama Foundation. If this isn’t a teachable moment, I don’t know what is.

One video on YouTube went so viral, it had 70,000,000 views: 70 Million Views!

That’s a lot of people knowing inside the fur vest Harley bragged repeatedly about buying at Neiman Marcus is trash. As much as I want to hate on Harley, as much as I want to build myself up by knocking her down, if I’m honest about it, if I dig deep enough, I have to admit this: I’m trash too.

Take off the fur vest, Harley. Look inside your heart.